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Welcome to the World of Big Poppa E

May. 7th, 2011 | 10:26 am

this is the where bpe used to write about his life in endless detail, back before the word "blogging" entered our language, back when it was just a bunch of people writing about their lives for each other rather than the whole wide world.

click on the "Archive" link at the left of this page, and you can check out journal entries going all the way back to february, 2001, which is when bpe discovered livejournal, which was the best little online community ever.

this was his life.

enjoy it.

if you would like to check out big poppa e's current journal, just take a stroll over to and you can see his latest entries!

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RIP lil' wayne...

May. 23rd, 2010 | 06:49 pm

damn shame...

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oh... my... god...

May. 14th, 2010 | 06:34 pm

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Apr. 1st, 2010 | 06:55 pm


ladies and gentlemen, i don't often get political in my poetry, however i ask you... how many casualties must there be before we stop... this... war?

and i'm not talking about the war in iraq! and i'm not talking about the war in afghanistan!

we must stop this inhumane war... against female pubic hair!

women are denuding their privates on a scale akin to the destruction of the amazon rain forest. no wonder they call it a "brazilian wax!" coincidence? i think not!

any man who would insist that his lover's most precious pajayjay be smooth as a baby's bottom... wants to have sex with a baby's bottom. but i say, "no more!"

a bearded clam... is a happy clam!

pubic hair is there for a reason. it's nature's shock absorber. it's god's way of saying, "i don't want you kids getting all chafey and red while you are being fruitful and multiplying! so here's a little present for you. Boo-ya! Knock yourselves out!"

and on the 7th day, the good lord sayeth, "the bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin'."

give me a women strong enough to turn her back on the bald head of sinead o'connor and boldy embrace angela davis and let her vag-fro grow!

put down your razors! i don't need no damned landing strip! i'm a jungle pilot. just fly me over the thickest deepest tangles, and i'll parachute in with nothing but a machete and a smile... and by "machete" i mean my hairy cock!

women of the world! throw away your weed whackers, and bust out the miracle gro! i'm your lamb of love, baby, let me graze! baaaa!

here's the thing: women are human, and humans are mammals, and mammals have hair, so when a woman has hair down there, mon frere, i declare it's the most womanly thing she can wear.

and it's not so much about what it looks like or feels like, but what it represents.

a shorn pudendum says, "fuck me with your gender norms, fuck me with your ideas about what is appropriate for women, fuck me with your notions of what makes a female truly attractive,"

but a big ol' gnarly bush says, "fuck you and your stifling definitions of femininity! fuck you and your need to control me! this is what a real woman looks like, and if you can't handle it, son, then you ain't never gonna handle it, son!"

ladies! toss those tuna trimmers and never suffer razor burns again on your tender labia for some stupid overgrown boy who can't handle the truth!

don't look to depilated internet porn for your coochie-snorcher imagery! go back to '70s porn, where eager beavers frolicked wild and free! and looked just like my face! (capital O with mouth, hold it... audience goes wild...)

when the good lord spoke to moses, it was not through some leafless shrub! hell no, it was through the burning bush! now get on over here, sister, and let me set that lush ill nana on fire and make you hear the voice of god!

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a new mixtape for you to download and enjoy

Mar. 11th, 2010 | 10:38 am

made a new mixtape. you can download it for seven days by clicking here, then it disappears. enjoy. setlist is below.

Airplanes, by Local Natives
Hannah, by Freelance Whales
The Ghost Inside, by Broken Bells (featuring Danger Mouse and the guy from The Shins)
Sleepyhead, by Passion Pit
Little Girl (feat. Julian Casablancas), by Sparklehorse and Danger Mouse
Written in Reverse, by Spoon
What Your Baby's Been Doing, by Small Sins
Flare Gun, by Owen Pallett (formerly called Final Fantasy)
Marrow, by St. Vincent
Hold That Tiger, by Starlight Mints
News To Go Farther, by Ui
100 Yard Dash, by Raphael Saadiq
Horchata, by Vampire Weekend
Don't Look That Way At It, by White Denim
Steven, by Voxtrot
Be A Star, by Oh No! Oh My!
Throwin' Shapes, by Minus the Bear
Little Sad Eyes, by Magnolia Electric Co.
Be Good, by Tokyo Police Club
Teenage Lust, by Times New Viking
I Can't Let Go, by The Thermals
Violet, by Thao Nguyen & The Get Down Stay Down
Acts of Man, by Midlake
'81, by Joanna Newsom
Cleo's Song, by JBM

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our community

Mar. 5th, 2010 | 03:48 pm

gabrielle bouliane
shannon leigh
brenda moossy
the po-ho
angela boyce
chris branch
lisa king
peter of the earth
ken hunt
pat storm


one day all of our names will be on that list.

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thinking out loud about illegal downloading

Mar. 2nd, 2010 | 01:43 pm

i just downloaded the latest three-cd release by joanna newsom, one of my favourite quirky little indie artists. she plays the harp and sings like bjork about things like bears and constellations and queens and kung fu. and by downloading, i mean illegally downloading, like i did not pay for it, i just used this online illegal downloader site called pirate's bay.

i have been doing that a lot lately.

i used to belong to an online music subscription service called emusic, and it was awesome since it only focused on little indie bands that mostly no one had ever heard of except for fans of little indie bands. what you did was you paid $20 a month and you got 100 downloads, and the mp3 files were high quality and completely unprotected, which meant you could play them on any digital media player and share them with people without worrying about repercussions. it worked out to only 20 cents per song, which meant you could get whole indie albums for, like, two or three bucks, which was awesome since why in the world would you steal music if you could support your favourite little indie band so cheaply, right? it was all legal and above board and SO much cheaper than buying an actual CD for $20, which is something i haven't done in years and will never ever do again no matter who's selling it.

but then emusic decided it wanted to expand and include music from the major labels, all of whom objected to their pricing structure, so they cut down the amount of songs for your $20 to 40 per month, which... do the math... songs were now 50 freaking cents, which is still cheaper than itunes and amazon, but still... that drove up the cost of an indie band's latest cd to $6 or $7, which was just... man... on my limited budget... it was just too much, and the jacked up thing about it was that this new pricing structure didn't serve the indie bands at all, no, it served the idiots out there looking for billy joel songs and elton john songs, and oooooh.... that just pissed me off so bad, so much so that i wrote this scathing letter to emusic about how they were turning their backs on the lovely indie rock music scene they had so carefully seduced to their site and who had a profound sense of loyalty to their site, and all because they wanted to sell freakin' whitney houston songs to idiots who had no loyalty to the site whatsoever.

i received a terse reply.

so, i quit, and i told them i was quitting, and i told them the only reason i had not resorted to outright music piracy was their indie rock pricing structure, and now i was being driven to the online illegal downloading community, and it was all their fault. their pricing change and desire to court the big labels was hurting indie rock.

again, i received a terse reply.

so, my career as a music pirate began, and now that i am used to being able to get ANYTHING i want at any time for free, i don't think i can ever go back to actually paying for music, which means i am focusing on how i can make sure my little lovely indie bands can actually make a living by making music.

in my mind, the big bands like pink floyd and peter gabriel and the rolling stones and the beatles can kiss my ass, to be perfectly honest, because i have purchased ALL of their albums on numerous formats throughout the years, and i am not going to give them another penny. but the little indie bands? i feel differently about them since they are little artists just trying to make a living through their music. and the thing is... artists make so very little money from physical CDs sold in record stores, like, pennies per sale, and they make even less with digital downloads, so they are already having to deal with the fact that they need to find other means of supporting themselves. and the way they do that is through touring and selling merch at their shows and by also selling stuff directly from their websites, and that's how i support them. it makes me feel good to go see my favourite little indie band and know they are getting a much higher percentage of the door money than they would at the record store, plus they are most likely making the t-shirts themselves and keeping all the money, so i don't mind spending $20 on a t-shirt if i know the bands gets to keep all the profit. same thing for indie bands who make their own cds and sell them at their shows. i will buy one of those in a second just to keep the band going.

i am just thinking out loud here.

the way i figure it, the people making music today have to make their music available in a way that cannot be illegally downloaded. that's the only way they can make money. if their only product is a digital download, then people will pirate it, and that's that, and i really have a hard time blaming the music lovers for doing this since the product being offered is so shitty. the music on itunes is inferior, and i'm not talking the music itself, i am talking the quality of the coding of the actual mp3. it's such a huge step down in quality from music on a CD, which is itself a step down in quality from an LP, and yet we still have to pay out the nose for it. plus, it has DRM protection on it, which limits your use of it, which is totally freaking lame. and if anything should happen to your mp3 that you bought from itunes, well, tough shit, you have to buy it all over again, the very same thing that you have already bought. me? if i lose some music i pirated, i just go pirate it again. blam, problem solved.

if businesses like itunes want to keep making money off an ever-decreasing nation of music fans who are increasingly unwilling to actually pay for their music, then they've got to increase the quality of the mp3s they offer and lower the price to the point where the idea of stealing it is stupid... like emusic used to be.

and if they want to offer physical product, they've got to offer something that cannot be digitally copied and illegally downloaded, like kick-ass album art and cool booklets and see-though vinyl records and cool stickers and stuff like that. the grammy award for best album art a few years ago went to this tiny little indie band called menomena for their utterly amazing cd design, and it was SO cool that it made people want to buy it so they could have it and play with it and show people. i saw a dude online the other day who sold a deluxe version of his cd where the case was an actual electronic musical instrument that people could play! it was so cool! you can't illegally download that stuff! and you also can't duplicate the live music experience, so that's where the focus should be, provided a truly inimitable live show that people will want to pay real money to see. and cool t-shirt and stickers, because you can't download either of those.

i don't know... the whole industry needs to be restructured, and i think the future of the whole shebang is in the hands of the little indie bands trying to figure out how to make a living working directly with fans who want to support them yet don't want to have to pay for shitty digital copies of the music. the regular old mp3s should be given away for free, or next to free, and then you can offer higher quality CDs and records and really-good mp3s for those who want to pay for them, plus super deluxe versions of physical product for those who are really into being a fan and getting the cool stuff.

from now on, it's not just about the music, it's how you deliver it, and what else you provide with it. bands who want to be a success are no longer simply musicians, they are multimedia companies provided art in all sorts of formats, and the mp3s are simply the advertising portion of what they do, getting the word out there, developing a fan base who can then come to the biggest money-making part of their art, the live shows, and show their support by buying physical product that cannot be illegally downloaded.

instead of fighting downloading and suing music fans who are tired of being forced to buy shitty products at exorbitant prices, the big music companies need to roll with the new system, and they are not, they are still stuck in a time when there were records stores and people bought CDs. that time is over, and the indie bands are now creating their own means of making a living with their music that does not include the big companies.

so... i don't really feel bad illegally downloading any more. if they can't figure this out, then fuck 'em.


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my boy theo hiding in the clean fresh laundry

Mar. 1st, 2010 | 03:13 pm

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Feb. 25th, 2010 | 02:58 pm

so, i was thinking maybe people would like an MP3 version of gabrielle bouliane's last performance, so i ripped the audio from the video and made it into a high-quality MP3.

i am taking a break from facebook and myspace, so please share the link below with anyone you think would appreciate it:

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snowing in texas

Feb. 23rd, 2010 | 12:04 pm

warning: i SO sound like leonardo dicaprio in "what's eating gilbert grape" in this video. i'm just saying.

it's snowing! in texas!

so, i'm all sitting in my bed using my wireless mouse and extra long extendo-corded keyboard to surf my email, and i'm all reading email, and a friend of mine here in austin had sent me an email saying that she was watching the snow from her office window, and i'm all, "what? snow???"

so i jumped out of bed barefooted and in my nothing but a t-shirt and some boxer-briefs and i race outside, and oh my god! it's SOOO snowing! big ol' fluffy feathers of snow! i started screaming to my roomies, "it's snowing! it's snowing!" and amanda runs downstairs in her flannel jammies with penguins on them and her boobs flopping all over the place, and she's like, "snow!!! it's snowing!!! lennon come down!!!!" and lennon just grumps that it's snow, big deal, and me and amanda are like, "tickle torture olympics!" so we run upstairs and attack lennon with tickles and body slams and fend off his pillow swipes, and then i pants amanda and screamed, "i saw your buttcrack! i saw your buttcrack!"

my friend's email started that! her little butterfly wings in hong kong of an email set into motion the hurricane of buttcrack in my apartment. how cool is that?

and you know what? yeah, i know, i get it, it's freaking snowing everywhere right now, but fuck all y'all, it never snows in austin, so woooo!!!! snow day!!!!

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